Staying in Control
Posted by Diva on February 22nd, 2010 | No Comments »
Not all sex workers are naturally dominant. Of course there are plenty who specialise in this area, but I’ve heard of many escorts who just lie back and think of England when they’re with a client. From personal experience, I would say that a large proportion of men like women to be assertive in bed, even if you’re not introducing any BDSM. A girl who knows what she wants is very sexy, so it’s great to show this sexually.
If you’re not quite sure how to go about this, there are plenty of ways to get started. Appointments usually last a minimum of an hour, so you have plenty of time to tease before doing the deed. Start by flashing a bit of flesh to get their imagination going; perhaps do a Sharon Stone by uncrossing your legs, maybe lean forward to expose some cleavage. Be the one to initiate kissing or touching, stopping when they start to get too carried away. Give them just enough to keep them going, but leave them begging for more.
Once you get in bed, climb on top and straddle them to show your client who’s boss; pin their arms by their side or above their head while you work some magic with your lips. I like to kiss and lick slowly down their body, but just when they think you’re going in for the kill, tease a bit longer by concentrating inside their thighs where it’s still sensitive. By the time you take them into your mouth or inside you, they’ll be so relieved and grateful that your client will feel forever indebted to you!
I may have been called a cock tease in my time, but they all worshipped me by the time I left!
x Diva x
Working on a Hangover
Posted by Diva on February 19th, 2010 | No Comments »
Yes, we’ve all done it. Unless you’re t-total or have remarkable will power, there will come a time when you have to work on a heavy hangover. Clients often offer you drinks throughout the evening, and it can be easy to get carried away with a fine wine. There are a few things you can do to minimise the pounding head and nausea the following morning, as long as you plan ahead.
If you know you’ll be having a tipple later, make sure you eat properly first. Drinking on an empty stomach gets you drunk much faster, and if someone has paid good money for an escort they don’t want to be holding your hair back while you’re sick! Sip your drinks slowly; if you drink your first one quickly, it’s likely that your glass will be topped up pronto. Also stick to that old rule of not mixing your drinks – stick to either wine or spirits.
Dehydration is what makes your hangovers feel so awful, so drink water throughout the night. Alcohol may be a liquid, but it does dehydrate you. Try to drink a whole glass of water before you go to sleep. Your body will need to be replenished in the morning, so take multivitamins (especially vitamin C) in the morning. Eat a balanced breakfast too, even if you don’t feel hungry. You’ll be glad later in the day!
There are loads of different hang over cures out there, but you need to remember that alcohol poisons your body so it’s always going to affect you. I just follow the tips above to make myself feel as human as possible!
x Diva x
Double Life
Posted by Diva on February 16th, 2010 | No Comments »
Living in London can certainly keep you busy. Although some do it loud and proud, many sex workers keep their job discreet so they end up living a kind of secret double life. It can become difficult to juggle the two, always having to come up with an alibi for when you’re out on a booking.
I dealt with this by confiding in my closest friends, those who I trusted and knew wouldn’t judge me. The most important are those who you live with (if you have house mates); they will be the ones who ask where you’re going, who notice you creep in during the dead of night. It will be difficult to maintain a lie and could make you feel awful, so think carefully about who you shack up with. A lot of escorts I know live with each other so there are no questions asked. Be careful if you do incalls though – if there are any more than two of you in a flat or house, it could be considered a brothel and you’d run into big problems with the law. You don’t want to upset the neighbours!
Unless your parents are extremely open minded or worked in the sex industry themselves, it’s not a good idea to confide in them. Ultimately you know them best and it’s down to your judgement, but they will be overprotective and worry about you – personally I never thought it was worth it.
Boyfriends are another thing… don’t tell him unless you absolutely trust that he’ll keep your secret. You should also be prepared for him to reject you – many people can’t deal with this kind of information. If it’s someone you want to settle down with or move in with, you will need to tell the truth and accept the consequences. They might ask you to stop, they might be ok with it. Again, this one is your call!
A double life can be hard, but you can’t deny it’s exciting…
x Diva x
Sex Toys
Posted by Diva on February 15th, 2010 | No Comments »
If you are a sex worker who visits clients, it’s a good idea to have at least a basic knowledge of what sex toys are on the market. Some may request that you bring them to appointments, either to use on you or them. You should practise with them by yourself before using them with a client – it’s the kind of homework that you won’t mind doing!
The most common sex toy is a dildo or vibrator; these come in all shapes and sizes, colours and textures. Most are shaped like a penis, sometimes curving up slightly at the end so they can hit your G spot (on the front wall of your vagina). It’s not uncommon for men to feel threatened or jealous if your vibrator is bigger than their own manhood; it may sound silly, but men are often insecure about the size of their penis – it’s how they measure their worth sometimes! If you’re not sure what they want, take a selection of sizes and start off with the smallest.
If you’re taking sex toys for him, make sure they’re used as intended; anal dildos always have extra material at the base to prevent it getting lost inside, unlike those intended for vaginal use.
One of the most important things to remember is to clean your sex toys thoroughly; it’s not advisable to share them, but there are plenty of products on the market to keep your props hygienic. Never put anything inside your vagina after it has been in his or your anus – this can cause infection. If you’re planning on swapping holes, use a condom on the toy and change it when you swap.
Be safe, go steady!
x Diva x
Natural Remedies
Posted by Diva on February 10th, 2010 | No Comments »
For most jobs, getting ill is a real hindrance. Escorting requires a fair amount of physical exertion (to put it politely), and nobody wants to meet with a woman who’s pale, snotty or clammy.
I’d be the first one to pop a couple of paracetamol when I have a headache, but I’m also a big believer in natural remedies. The first rule of good health is pretty simple: look after your body. If you fill it with crap (drink, drugs, fast food), chances are you’re going to feel run down a lot of the time. You need sleep and exercise to stay healthy. Make sure you get plenty of vitamin C (found in oranges). The days of scurvy may be over, but this boosts your immune system and will help your body fight little viruses that try to take hold.
When I was younger I used to regularly suffer from colds and sore throats. Honey and lemon is a classic remedy that is still copied by most medicines; I dissolved mine in boiling water and drank it as a tea. For sore throats, you can also add thyme (boiled in a pot like tea leaves). Thyme has been used as a medicine for decades, and has great effects on your respiratory system. It’s also beneficial for asthma sufferers.
For your throat, boil some sage. Instead of drinking it, gargle this to soothe your throat – it is a natural antiseptic. Ingesting sage is also said to be good for bloating and gas.
Some are more obvious, such as using oil for dry skin. There are remedies all around you, so if you’re looking for a natural pick me up, do a quick search online and you’ll find loads of ideas!
x Diva x
Party Girls
Posted by Diva on February 8th, 2010 | No Comments »
When you start working in the sex industry, you soon become familiar with all of the jargon. It’s a good idea to learn what some of the phrases mean before going to meet a client, just in case they’ve asked for something you’re not prepared to do but you didn’t understand the ‘code’!
One of the most common is GFE which means girlfriend experience, where the client will expect intimate kissing and cuddling. A Levels has nothing to do with your schooling; this refers to anal sex. OWO means oral sex without a condom, and CIM in come in mouth – you’ll probably be expected to swallow.
One phrase that is sometimes misinterpreted is ‘party girl’. If a client requests one of these, you won’t just need to dance like Beyonce; this usually refers to an escort who is willing to take drugs with the client, drink alcohol and stay up all night with them. Cocaine is the most commonly shared, but you may also come across ecstasy/MDMA or Ketamine and marajuana towards the end of the night. Of course these drugs are illegal, but if you do decide to participate make sure you know your own limits and stay in control of yourself. Chances you don’t know where the client gets their supplies from so it could be dangerous; make sure you have a friend or agency who know exactly where you are and who you’re with.
Whatever you decide to do, do it in moderation and be safe!
x Diva x
Weekends
Posted by Diva on February 5th, 2010 | No Comments »
This may be stating the obvious, but for most sex workers the weekend is the busiest time. Often clients are off work at this time and like to give themselves a little treat.
This can be very inconvenient for your social life; chances are that weekends are when your friends go out together, but you may find that you have to miss out because you’re working. When I was working as an escort, I used to always take Sundays and Mondays off, regardless of which other days I was working. This made me feel like my life had some structure, and I could have a lazy day with my boyfriend while he was off work on a Sunday. This may have meant sacrificing one good day’s pay, but I could work all on Friday and Saturday night to bring in the bacon (no pun intended).
You need to decide what your priorities are; perhaps you could organise your schedule to work every other weekend, or come to some agreement with your agency. Just remember to give yourself a little time otherwise you may end up resenting your job and not appreciating the hard earned cash as much as you could!
x Diva x
Masturbation
Posted by Diva on February 4th, 2010 | No Comments »
I was 13 when I had my orgasm. In the year leading up to that, I’d noticed that it felt nice to touch myself down below; wearing tight jeans, I’d lean forward so that the seam rubbed against my clitoris, but at the time I didn’t really know what a clit was! I remember exactly where I was when I first climaxed. My parents had left me home alone, and I was watching a video taped off the TV. After the film finished, it flickered into another film that I didn’t recognise – something French. I watched wide eyed as a middle aged married man carried a young lady to a window, and proceeded to have full sex with her. I later found out that film was Last Tango in Paris, and that scene was rewound many a time for my pleasure. As I watched it a second time, I drew all the curtains and unbuttoned my jeans. I rubbed where it felt nice, then got impatient and pulled my jeans and knickers down to my ankles. Rewinding the scene once again, I felt myself get moist and used this to rub myself faster. My first orgasm was quite short because I was scared to carry on, but I remember feeling my whole body get hot and tremble violently.
Since then, my masturbation patterns have varied greatly. Sometimes I’ll do it several times a day, sometimes not for a week. My husband enjoys watching me as I do him; sometimes we watch porn together and watch each other get off.
Masturbation should never be something you’re ashamed of. Everyone starts at different ages, and unless you do it so much that it interferes with your work or social life, it’s not a problem. Men have a limit on how many times they can ejaculate in a day (it varies), so don’t get irritated if they’re worn out and can’t manage any more sex. That’s perfectly normal; in fact, most men come once then want to go to sleep!
Women can actually increase their libido by pleasuring themselves often; use the skills you’ve learned to teach your man how you like it. It’s a beautiful thing!
x Diva x
Personal Hygiene
Posted by Diva on February 3rd, 2010 | No Comments »
This is SO important for both men and women, especially if you’re involved in the sex industry! If you’re a man hiring an escort, you really must take a shower shortly before she/he arrives. Wash everything properly, brush your teeth and use deodorant. There really is nothing more unpleasant than bad smells when you’re trying to get in the mood, and you’ll probably enjoy the whole experience a lot more if your escort is enjoying herself. If you don’t smell good, your escort may bring it up and ask you to shower, which would be embarrassing and awkward for both of you. Avoid any of this and shower regardless, even if you don’t think you’re dirty! Better to be on the safe side.
If you’re a sex worker who meets clients, the same goes for you. Be as clean as you can to make everything more pleasant for the customer; that way they’re more likely to book you again. If it’s impossible to shower between appointments, there are plenty of portable products these days, such as deo wipes and Femfresh. Do the best you can!
Good luck smelling lovely,
x Diva x
Compassionate Leave
Posted by Diva on February 2nd, 2010 | No Comments »
Being a sex worker usually means you get the final say in when you work. Some escort agencies can be pushy about you coming in, but unless you take the piss by only waltzing in once a fortnight, you get to decide which days or nights suit you (if you want complete control then working independently is the best bet).
Although you can feel obliged to work if you’ve recently had time off, there’s no point if you’re in a bad frame of mind. Just like any other career, compassionate leave may be necessary if you receive some bad news or go through a traumatic experience. Even if you are physically well, you won’t be able to do your job properly if your mind is somewhere else and you’re feeling emotionally fragile.
I once tried to meet a client when I’d had some bad news; I thought I could put on a front and act my way through it, but I was too delicate and the appointment was a disaster. Clients hire escorts to make themselves feel good, so don’t go if you’re likely to make them feel bad!
If you are with a strict escort agency, they may not sound very sympathetic to you asking for ‘compassionate leave’. But stand your ground; working regardless could result on you losing a potentially regular client.
x Diva x