A Healthy Balance

Posted by Diva on September 1st, 2010 | No Comments »

When you’re a sex worker, it can be easy to let it become your whole life. The money is good so turning down jobs seems foolish, but before you know it you could find yourself working every night. I’ve always thought that it’s important to keep a balance between this and ‘real life’ – it is only a job, after all!

One way to do this is to limit yourself to a certain amount of days/bookings per week. This way you can be more flexible; working Monday – Friday means you might miss out on a great weekend booking, but making yourself available for any 5 days of the week allows you to make the most out of your work and your social life.

Keeping a separate phone and email address for escort work helps you to separate it from your normal life; there’s no chance of a message from a client being mixed up next to one from your Dad! Most sex workers wish to keep their profession private, and this is the best way to achieve this.

Just like any other kind of worker, you need to take holidays. It is more difficult for self employed people as you won’t make any money during this time, but if you budget properly throughout the year there’s no reason why you can’t have time off. It will keep you sane!

x Diva x

Legitimate Escort Agencies

Posted by Diva on August 31st, 2010 | No Comments »

I’ve had a few enquiries from people just starting out in the escort industry about how to know whether or not an escort agency is legitimate. You’d be surprised at how many websites are fake, and how many are unprofessional, badly managed agencies. It’s quite simple to find out if they are actually up and running, and how respectable they are.

The first thing to do is to check the contact details of the escort agency. Phone the number to see if your call is answered, and if the phone operator sounds professional. Also try emailing them to enquire about vacancies, asking more detailed information such as the standard procedure for bookings and the rate of pay. Remember that you won’t take home the full hourly rate advertised – you’ll have to pay the agency a cut of each booking.

Respectable agencies will provide their escorts with a driver to take them to and from bookings; the driver should stay outside for the duration to make sure you’re safe with your client. If you’re told to make your own way using public transport, you should steer clear!

A good agency will also ask to see your documents before hiring you. You’ll need to prove that you’re over 18 years old, and that you can work in the UK legally. If you can’t, I’m afraid you won’t be able to get a job with a respectable escort agency.

There are plenty of genuine agencies who don’t ask for any money upfront to advertise on their website; they only take a percentage once they have secured you a booking. They should never tell you what services you have to offer a client; this is up to you. You should only do what you are comfortable with, and not let anyone push your limits or control you.

Good luck out there,

x Diva x

Thank you!

Posted by Diva on August 18th, 2010 | No Comments »

After my last little rant, some genuine readers have got in touch with me, and I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate it. Even if I’m only helping out one sex worker, it makes writing this blog worth it! I’ve been out of the scene for over a year now, but as far as I know everything works the same way… please let me know if there’s anything you’d like me to look into that I haven’t touched on yet.

x Diva x

Stupid Spam

Posted by Diva on August 17th, 2010 | 3 Comments »

Do any real people read this blog? I find that I’m just inundated with spam comments all the time. It’s a bore.

Sod off spammers, roll up readers.

x Diva x

Understanding Your Industry

Posted by Diva on August 16th, 2010 | No Comments »

Imagine being an escort who gets bought dinner in fancy restaurants, accompanies rich men to social events and exclusive parties, without having to offer any sexual services. It’s practically the perfect job for any pretty girl who enjoys an active social life; so many young women are eager to become an escort so that they can live this dream. Sadly, it’s not a reality for many people. Don’t you think we’d all be doing it if it was that easy?!

Of course, not all men want to pay for sex. Some genuinely want a female companion for a social occasion, so they will pay for an escort from a reputable agency. However, I’m sure that the same girl has performed sexual services for 90% of her other clients! Agencies are not allowed to advertise that sex is for sale as this is illegal in the UK, so you’ll find that it’s only insinuated on most websites. If you still think it’s all innocent, take a look at the photos: girls with their breasts on display, sticking their bottoms towards you in a naughty outfit. I’m not criticising these girls in any way as I was an escort of this kind myself, but do you really think they’re just offering some company at your work’s Christmas party?

Most escort agencies offer sex, even if it doesn’t say so specifically on their website. To think that you can join this agency and not offer any sexual services is very naive; yes, you’re well within your right to say no, but the client is also within his right to never book you again, and the agency are within their right to not send any more bookings your way if you leave a trail of dissatisfied clients who you’ve said no to.

Be sensible about it if you decide to become an escort; do your research and make sure you know exactly what it is you’re getting into. If  I’m completely wrong and there are agencies who offer social companionship only, please do correct me!

Eating Light

Posted by Diva on August 13th, 2010 | No Comments »

Unless you cater for clients with a love for larger women, it’s important to stay in shape as a sex worker, and this means eating sensibly. I always envied the girls who were lucky enough to eat whatever they liked and stayed slim; some just have higher metabolisms than others. I had to work out to keep my size 10 shape, though I’ve relaxed into a comfortable 12 since quitting escorting.

I can’t give you too much advice here – everyone knows their own body and what size they’re comfortable being. However, I can recommend that you don’t eat too heavily in the hour before a booking – have you tried having sex on a full stomach? Nightmare! The trouble often lies when a client takes you out for dinner and then back to his hotel. You can get carried away with divine menus (especially when someone else is paying), filling yourself up on the finest lobster or duck. You don’t start regretting your decision until you realise that you’re about to get filled up a second time over…

Try to remember to eat lightly if you’ll be having sex later. Otherwise it will be uncomfortable for you, and could even make you feel sick – the last thing you want when you’re on an appointment. Heart burn, indigestion and gas are not the qualities that sell you as an escort!

If you tend to forget, you could try my trick of wearing a skin tight outfit – you’ll be more aware of bloating which will remind you not to over eat. If it’s too late, you may just need to stall him for a bit (assuming there’s still enough time). With any luck, he’ll be too full too and extend your booking. If that seems out of the question, all you can do is choose positions that don’t squash your stomach. If you’re self conscious of it, try bending over slightly while he takes you from behind – sexy and flattering!

Good luck,

x Diva x

Keeping Your Cash Safe

Posted by Diva on August 11th, 2010 | No Comments »

A lot of escorts are paid in cash, which can be very dangerous. It can make you an easy target for thieves, and you stand to lose a lot of earnings in one go. You should take whatever precautions you can to keep it safe, inside and outside the location of your appointment.

If you’re receiving incalls, this won’t be as much of a problem. All you need to do is fit a good security system and make sure your clients don’t steal from you! However, outcalls are more of an issue.

Discretion should be a part of the service you offer; there are still many laws surrounding prostitution in the UK, so this is to protect yourself as much as your client. When you’re on your way to or from a booking, it shouldn’t be obvious that you’re a sex worker. If it is obvious, a thief will know that you’re likely to be carrying a large amount of cash. Even if you’re on your way there and don’t have any, it could leave you shaken up or injured. Make sure you blend into your surroundings and don’t look blatantly like an escort.

Use a bag that has a proper fastening like a zip with an inside compartment. You’d be amazed at how talented the pick pockets in London are; they could reach in without you even being aware. Make it as hard for them as you can.

It’s usual for clients to pay you in cash upfront, so your money will be sat there for the duration of the appointment. Check it again before you leave and keep your bag near you or in sight throughout so that nobody else can take it. If you have multiple bookings in one night, you should leave your earnings with your driver or agency between appointments rather than piling up the pound notes in your bag.

Good luck, I hope the bucks come rolling in!

x Diva x

Rude Behaviour

Posted by Diva on August 10th, 2010 | No Comments »

Because they are paying for you to be with them, some men are under the illusion that they can treat escorts however they like. This could mean that they talk down to you, make derogatory comments or try to belittle you; in the worst cases, they can become physically violent. The clever ones will behave like the perfect gentleman initially, so not to raise the suspicion of your escort agency or driver. This is where the danger of being an escort lies.

Luckily, the majority of clients simply want your company (and your body) so they will be polite and treat you with respect; if you do happen to encounter one of the men who are rude to you, you’re under no obligation to stay. You shouldn’t let anyone make you feel bad about what you do, so if someone started to insult me during an appointment, I would leave.

Watch out for signs of drink or drug use which could affect their mood; even a regular client who is usually very nice could turn nasty with the wrong amount of narcotics. If they start getting pushy, aggressive or try to make you do things that you don’t want to do, get out of there.

Hopefully none of you get into a situation like that, but keep your wits about you just in case!

Temporary Intimacy

Posted by Diva on August 4th, 2010 | No Comments »

A lot of guys are looking for a GFE when they hire an escort (a girlfriend experience). It’s our job to make them feel like the centre of our world, as if we really want to be there with them and are not just doing it for the money. For the actresses among us, this isn’t hard – but there are plenty of girls who find it difficult to fake emotion without actually getting attached, or keeping it separate from their private lives.

If you’re in a relationship and you’re working as an escort, it’s a good idea to have something that differentiates the sex between you and your clients to your relations with your partner. Some girls won’t allow themselves to climax with clients, some won’t kiss on the lips and some think of themselves as a different person entirely when they’re working. It can be a mental separation, even if everything physical is the same.

Some things put the client off right away; although it might feel too intimate for you to make eye contact, this is an important part of a GFE. If you do choose to offer this service, the client will expect a lot of tactility and kissing. Just remember that it doesn’t need to mean the same thing to you as it does with your lover – it’s all about your frame of mind.

If you really can’t separate these feelings and it makes you feel uncomfortable, perhaps you should consider whether or not this is the right line of work for you. Some girls only choose to escort while they are single, some continue when they are married with children – it’s all about what feels right for you.

x Diva x

Staying Anonymous

Posted by Diva on August 2nd, 2010 | No Comments »

Understandably, many people working in the sex industry wish to keep their identities private. Unless your friends and family are very open minded and understanding, they may not be supportive of your decision to be a sex worker. There are several measures you can take to remain anonymous, however none of them are 100% fool proof; if you’re meeting clients who you’ve never seen before, you never know who they might be. That’s the risk that you have to take if you want to make money in this industry!

First of all, avoid looking for business in your immediate area; for example, I used to live in North London but only advertised in West and Central. It’s a small step, but at least you’re less likely to bump into your neighbours. It’s also a good idea to avoid bringing clients back to your home, otherwise those living with or near you will become suspicious about the amount of traffic coming through your door.

Of course, change your name. Some escorts stick with the same working name throughout their career to build up a good reputation, others change it on occasion to make themselves more difficult to find. Work on a first name only basis and don’t reveal your real name to any clients. Get a separate email address and mobile phone to use for work; this will avoid any slip ups and keep your sex work separate from the rest of your life.

In photos, it’s true that those who show their faces get the most bookings. However, you can still have nice, professional pictures with your face concealed; try a Venetian style mask, angles away from your face or using photo shop afterwards to obscure your face. The less you cover, the more aesthetically pleasing it will look; make sure your hair is visible and preferably your face shape.

Remember to conceal any scars, birthmarks or tattoos that might give away your identity; again, this can be done using photo shop.

Fingers crossed that you never bump into anyone you know while you’re working!

x Diva x

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